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Avin a larf

Started by windy miller, April 27, 2012, 11:59:56 AM

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windy miller

 I see there was a tugboat on the Thames recently playing a recording of
  the Monty Python tune sung by Eric Idle... "Always look on the bright side of life?
   In Contrast 
   I can't help recalling the Eric Idle sketch advertising his Funeral services...." ring 0412187 if your'e planning on snuffing it..Our Fiat 850 will at your door in 10 minutes!
   ...Free wine glass's with every certified stiff... :o    Re runs of all python films are
    available apparently.. well worth a second view!...

  I have just seen the latest episode of the TV documentary "the station@New st  Featuring two young guys ..namely Nathan and Matt???  Travelling on the last Virgin service from New st To wolves prior to the New franchise....  Coincidence?   
   ..Rail fans?  Really? surely not?

  Being stuck at home indefinitely until further notice If I can offer some humour to
  make your day just present me with a subject and I will do my best!!!  In the meantime Take care.... Windy.
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

Quote from: windy miller on March 27, 2020, 02:19:16 AM
I see there was a tugboat on the Thames recently playing a recording of
  the Monty Python tune sung by Eric Idle... "Always look on the bright side of life?
   In Contrast  it might have been worse... The Bee gees?  Staying A....???
   I can't help recalling the Eric Idle sketch advertising his Funeral services...." ring 0412187 if your'e planning on snuffing it..Our Fiat 850 will at your door in 10 minutes!
   ...Free wine glass's with every certified stiff... :o    Re runs of all python films are
    available apparently.. well worth a second view!...

 
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

#797
  I see the Trainline booking engine is/was refusing to refund advance tickets in
   favour of some future yet to be determined sometime/never alternative? .Assuming
  we live long enough to enjoy the trips!  We're here to help? who? Themselves presumably? .  .to your money!
     The only 'train' on offer here is the Gravy.... with the very real prospect of
    half the country "coughing up" :) maybe its time they took a hint and did
    the same while they still  have a viable business. >: Thieving  Basta*DS  ,   
   In contrast I have just received a re-payment authorisation from West mids Trains
   to be paid within the next eight days and no T&cs.


Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller


    3 eminent surgeons attended a BMA conference in London and began to share
    their most notable operations during their career. An american surgeon claimed
    to have performed a heart and lung operation on a new born child. An Italian
    surgeon claimed to have removed a brain tumour the size of an apple. While the 
    Russian surgeon claimed to have removed a wisdom tooth.  A tooth?? ..said the
     American... Why? we pull thousands of teeth every day in the states!!!...Ah yes!
     said the Russian, the guy was a secret serviceman and this was behind the Iron
     Curtain... And over there we have to keep our mouths shut!! ...
        So I pulled it out through his arse hole...  :)

   
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

  When I was very young and innocent I had my first date with a 13 year old girl.
    When We walked down the lane we saw a bull mounting a cow. Trying to
     be clever I told her the cow was on heat and gave off a smell which attracts
     the Bull. Later we saw a Dog mounting a bitch. I said the female gives off
      a smell which the dog recognises and they Mate. When I got her home
      I asked when she would like to see me again??...
         She said 'When your Cold gets better'!!.   Never understood girls... :-[
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

 When I was very little I had to share a bed with my two elder brothers  Unfortunately
    they both pissed the bed every night. I learnt to swim before I could walk!
                                                                                       Bernard M   RIP
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

WyreForestShuttle

I am a sure everyone would like to wish Tony a very Happy Birthday and to thank him for his forum likewise Stu for his incisive comments and to Winston for all his hard work and the hours he seems to moderate correcting posts and providing a wealth of bus related posts. Thank You all.

windy miller

#802
   here here . I totally agree tony is doing the job of two men.  (laurel and hardy)
   Well this is (or was) a page for humour ?...  :-\ :-\   Many happy returns Tony...
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

 A London bus driver who had died from covid 19 recently was buried today in north London.
The sad occasion was attended by his close family and friends accompanied by a quiet ceremony.
  Which made a pleasant change from the usual screaming,trepidation,fear and anxiety
   his driving would so often impose on his passengers..........RIP
   
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

  My Mates Mrs was taken to hospital with an unspecified illness. He asked her GP
   for a diagnosis.. " wer'e not sure...said the doctor,.."She either has full blown
   Aids or altzheimers.." How can I tell? My mate asked... "easy! said the doc....
   just drive her three miles up the road and leave her there.  If she finds her way
   home you need to stop shagging.... :)
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

    Bad News.. The cleanser "wash & Go" is currently in short supply at my local supermarket. Due to Covid demand customers are restricted to Two bottles.
   Good news.. The cleanser "Go & Wash" is available in southall where customers
    are restricted to 10 bottles...... :o.
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

 I read on wikipedia there was a potato famine in Ireland early last century?
  Nah... Irish... They just forgot where they planted them.... :)
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

 I picked up a hitch-hiker in cornwall last year he said "its very good of you to stop for me..you never know.. I could have been a serial killer!. .Nah I said.."The chances of Two serial killers in the same car must be astronomical....... ;)
 
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

  I did a 10 minute stand up routine in hull many years ago. A few months later I was with the same group of spotters (steam enthusiasts) staying overnight in a notorious pub in Ipswich which I think was called the 'Blue coat Boy'..apparently you could guarentee a  good punch up around closing time!..there was that much broken glass on the floor the alsatian was wearing slippers. :o..  Their usual saturday night 'open mike' routine included karaoke and the occasional comic. When I was approached by the lanlord he said..
  I believe you do a stand up routine?..... I said 'how did you know that?....  He said
   'iv'e had a tip off....Really? I said... National health or private?... ;)   
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

windy miller

  All this cotton picking nonsense about slavery....5p a day and all the cotton
  you can eat ?... they don't know ther'e born!! ............  :o
                                                                                   B Manning    RiP
Mind the Gap.....?:-)

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