Avin a larf

[the trainbasher]

I recently split with my ex over my obsession with calling wrestling moves during sex.

I tried to give her an Attitude Adjustment but she gave me a Stone Cold Stunner.



Before we broke up though, we did a bit of TLC

That was before I gave her a Tombstone piledriver off the ladders to the kitchen table.



On the day of the breakup, I had planned to turn Face

instead she gave me a Heel.

[the trainbasher]

How many Vince McMahons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. Lightbulb screwed lightbulb

[windy miller]

 When my late father had an industrial accident he was in a critical condition for 2 days.
When I called in the hospital to check how he was I was told he had been given his own room
and had been stabilised.  Good news I thought.. Until I opened the door. F'ng straw and
horseshit everywhere..... >:( >:(   Should've gone private.........

[windy miller]

  what's the difference between a Hippo and a zippo? .. one is Very Heavy and the others a
  little lighter..... oo :)   

[windy miller]

 ..Just solved an argument with my Missus....she reckons God must be a bloke! When I asked her to explain she insisted that if God was a woman she would make Semen taste
of chocolate!. The way she laps it up I thought it always did...:) One in the eye for me then... so to speak.....?
Now there's a novelty....  ;)

[windy miller]

  When I asked our local barmaid for a quick drink at closing time tonight she replied:  " I'm sorry.........
  I've got the towels on"....I had to explain to her that I only wanted a drink not a Shag.. ;)

[windy miller]

           A big thanks must go to all who contributed to the success of Sports Aid recently.
           Unfortunately there is always one individual prepared to profit from the misfortune
           of others as the following ad in a Freetown advertiser has shown......
           "Berko" is a 10 year old African boy with poor eyesight, One arm, and One leg.
           Undaunted he cycles 6 miles to school each day on a rusty bike with a wobbly wheel,
          Flat tyres, One Pedal, and no brakes. If you send me $20 I will send you the Video...
           Its Absolutely Hilarious.........

[windy miller]

When I approached my local pharmacist recently for a supply of my usual Ultra Large
Condoms, the young assistant replied apologetically," I'm sorry we are currently out of stock"..
"..Have you tried Boots??. "Yes". I replied...I did once,. But the Jizz came out of the lace holes!
     >:( >:( :o

[windy miller]

     Just got back from the commonwealth games... had a great time but my Mrs did
    nothing but complain the whole time.... I suppose I should have told her I was going..  still
   ....  I've promised to take her to the next one in 2022 instead.......    (on the bus)    ;)

[windy miller]

As I approached my seventh birthday my father sat me on his knee and explained the
birds and the bees........  'Son'. He said, 'Always remember this.... 'its the second hole
   from the back of the neck....or you'll be in the Shit...As my Mrs often reminds me on Saturday nights...usually after my seventh pint.... >:( :) :) :)

[windy miller]

A Manchester City Fanzine reported that Mrs Ferguson had asked for a course of Viagra.
for her husband. As she explained to their GP, "I don't want him getting a Full Erection...
  Just enough lift to stop him pissing in his slippers.......... :)

[windy miller]

When Charles and Camilla arrived at a famous opera house in Sussex recently Prince Charles was wearing a Fox-Fur hat.  When he was asked why he said "M m'a asked  me where I was going...When I said 'Glyndebourne' she replied.... Wear the Fox Hat.....At least I think that's what she said...... ???

[windy miller]

I see these characters who like to take photo's up women's skirts in supermarkets may face a hefty fine or better still a jail sentence.    If they are so keen to see a picture of a c*nt they should stop at home and take a selfie.......... :)

[windy miller]

 Robbie Williams biggest No 1 was 'Angels'............ His biggest No 2 was..........
       Three lumps behind a bike shed in Stoke when he was 15........ :o

[I love Walsall buses]

What's a hedgehogs favourite food?

Prickled onions.